Women giving birth in movies look 100x perfect than what actually happens in real life, and so far from what we actually feel when the action starts down there. – Supposedly it doesn’t hurt, – but just feels uncomfortable..
Sometimes it fucking hurts you wanna kill the person next to you. I sincerely apologise to all the delivery room nurses, we just felt like ripping you to pieces when we’saw you because something is actually getting ripped out – totally ripped out – down under.
Now don’t get me wrong, birth is beautiful.
I love my boys and grateful to have them. They are the most precious things on earth! But really, giving birth’ain’t pretty. It sucks!
We asked mums too, – about what’s most shocking or disgusting part of giving birth…
And this is what you told us!
“What I wasn’t prepared for was the sound of my placenta being delivered. Most disgusting soggy wet slurping sound ever!!!”
Candida O (Facebook)
“THE BURN”
Belinda R (Facebook)
“The moment when you feel the sting and burn of the head coming out and you later realise that you have hemmeroids the size of Mt Everest near your butt, and pooping becomes so very, very painful!”
Vanessa Jae C (Facebook)
“My baby had a bowel movement in utero, so the first thing I heard when the doctor opened me up for the c-secion was ‘Whoa!, Somebody pooped in the pool!”
Rosanna B (Facebook)
“Trying to throw up during my c-section, while the push and shove to get my 10lb 5oz baby out… I just kinda layed there like Jesus with my tongue to the side… lol so gross!”
Ali R (Facebook)
“My Grandmother was present at the delivery. After the final push as my daughter was born, I looked over to my grandmother to see if she was crying… She wasn’t. – She was standing in the corner, horrified at what she had just witnessed. – After the chaos died down I asked her why she was so horrified, having given birth herself. – She looked me dead in the eye and said ‘I have never seen no shit like that in my life. – Don’t call me ’til the baby’s born on the next one, OK Mija?
Janay Danica G (Buzzfeed)
“I got really drunk on gas and air with my second daughter, and said that I could smell melted vanilla ice cream, and that everything tasted blue.”
Maggie S (Facebook)
“Smelling my skin burn as they cauterized the incision”
Leia B (Facebook)
“The umbilical cord snapped off the placenta so the doctor stuck his arm up there and just scooped it out!”
Holly A (Facebook)
“Right after my daughter was born and they were sewing up my second degree tear, my husband says ‘Whatever you do, don’t look in the mirror, it’s a disaster down there!”
Karen H (Facebook)
“The final pull to get him out of me and squirt! – Blood and fluids all over my Doctors face and glasses”
Carli B (Facebook)
“Scooping the poo out of the birth pool. – Lucky it’s a job usually left for support workers.”
Mirranda G (Facebook)
“The burning ring of fire!”
Nykita S (Facebook)
“When they break your water, how much water there actually is!”
Diana L (Facebook)
“Before my son was born, my husband and I made an agreement that he would not look down there… Well after he was out and they were going about the after-business, I saw’him making a weird face. – I asked him if he looked, he nodded yes and said he saw the placenta. – He then whispered that it looked like a meat toupee’.
Sandra W (Facebook Via Buzzfeed)
“I wanted to see the baby’s head and asked for a mirror.. I thought they would give me a little hand mirror… THEY DIDN”T. – It was a full length and I saw it all. – OH GOD! – That and them smashing my stomach after birth to get the clots out (I thought they were going to grab my spine through my tummy!”
Kira-Lee H (Facebook)
“The sickly sweet smell of the waters.”
Madi W (Facebook)
“I felt what I thought was a No. 2 slip out just as I got into the birthing pool. I said to my husband ‘Oh my God, I pooped in the pool!’. – Just then, a big bubble floated to the surface and I said ‘Oh my God, I birthed an alien!’. – The midwife grabbed the ‘bubble’ and tore it open. My son was born inside of his amniotic sack.”
Laura D (Facebook Via Buzzfeed)
“Nobody tells you what your lady bits look like after giving birth. I had a full length mirror in front of me and kept having to ask the midwives to move it lol!”
Jo M (Facebook)
“The lack of dignity, the amount of people who put their hands (feels like arms) but your hoo haa to ‘feel the baby’. – I had prolonged 1st and 2nd stages so in the end there were 13 medical staff in the room when bub was born. – I think every one of them saw more of me than I ever have. lol”
Allie R (Facebook)
“The sound of the umbilical cord being cut! My husband cut it first and then I got to cut the access cord off and I thought it would just go ‘snip’ but no, it was like a crunch noise and was tricky to cut through!. – The thing that shocked me the most was seeing the big pan of blood get wheeled out! – I was just staring at it thinking ‘Oh my gosh, wow! – that’s MY blood and wow, that’s A LOT.”
Jennifer W (Facebook)
“What’s most shocking is that it feels like the baby comes out of your bum!”
Trisha L (Facebook)
“The sonic boom fart I did in my OB’s face as I was pushing lol”
Katie M (Facebook)
“Looking up into the light into the theatre which has mirrors in it and seeing that cut fully open.”
Paulette Teresa A (Facebook)
“The pooping part, why did no one find the need to warn me of this embarrassment!”
Tracey B (Facebook)
“The mess afterwards! – No one told me it would be like a crime scene. – Not that I cared then as I had a beautiful new bubba monopolising my thoughts. – But man, what a mess! – Why anyone would have a home birth is beyond me for the simple reason I wouldn’t want to have to clean up all that gunk afterwards lol”
Kath S (Facebook)
“The placenta. That shit is gross! – Silly curious me asked to see it after my first baby. – Never again. The most awkward was having my midwife who is also a good friend sit at the end of the bed after the birth of my second and tug on the placenta trying to encourage it to come out. Awkward.”
Melanie B (Facebook)
“When the doctor and midwives came in wearing gum boots and plastic aprons. I thought, ‘what the hell is going on, what’s going to happen’. Then after my son was born and they were helping me into the bathroom, I looked back at the bed, and the floor under it – and I understood”.
Jennifer G (Facebook)
“Trying to walk around after my water broke, what’s up with the tuna water that never ends?”
Denise O (Facebook)
“Having my Mum shave me to prepare for my emergency C-section”
Shannon B(Facebook)
Now these are two men watching a video of a woman giving birth:
So, how do you feel about giving birth right now?
Have your say!